Parody of 30 minutes of Heaven Yaoi version
by otaku-sensei
Summary: Select male characters from Air Gear, Death Note, Bleach, Code Geass, D- Gray Man, Naruto, Gintama, 1/2 Prince, The World Only God Knows, Shugo Chara, Fairy Tail, and Kateiyoshi Hitman Reborn gather together to play. Purely comedy. yaoi w/out smut.


_For this chapter, to fully understand it, I advise you to read Gintama...if you are planning to just skip over this story, read/watch Gintama anyways, you won't regret it. _

**Huge Yaoi Crossover-Intro **(How it all started, a.k.a how a bunch of brainless idiots found themselves playing 30 minutes in heaven.)

Although it says there's only Death Note and Gintama, this story also includes mangas Kateiyoshi Hitman Reborn, Air Gear, Naruto, Code Geass, 1/2 Prince, The World Only God Knows, Bleach, D Gray Man, Fairy Tail, and Shugo Chara. (mentally barfs at the thought of the manga, sorry Shugo Chara fans...crap, this might get me some haters...)

_Note: this story is more making fun of yaoi than actual smut...basically parody and comedy. Plz comment, or else I won't be able to make the story better.  
_

Gin sees a lot of people in his driveway.

Gin: What the hell?

Kagura: Gin-san, why are you staring out the window for so long?

Gin: Some people are gathering outside…look. I think they might all be our customers! XD

Shinpachi: Really?!?! Finally, we can have money! Maybe my sister won't think I'm hanging out with a bunch or mados after all!

Kagura: OHH!!! Maybe I can even add condiments to rice! Oh! We might even be able to feed Sadaharu! (Sadaharu is the dog.)

Shinpachi: -_- We aren't that poor. Anyways, why don't we go downstairs and greet them.

Gin: No, we have to show our superiority to those seeking out our service. Hahaha. (Evil laugh) FINALLY, we will be able to feed the dog! (While laughing evilly, gin begins to pick his nose.)

Shinpachi: I just said we aren't that poor! Look at Sadaharu! We're feeding him JUST FINE! I mean he's SO BIG! WE'RE FREAKING FEEDING THE DOG BETTER THAN OURSELVES!

…………. (The room is quiet after Shinpachi's outburst.)

Sadaharu goes up to Shinpachi, and puts Shinpachi's head in his mouth. A lot of blood comes out. (If you've read the manga, you'd understand what I'm trying to say...hopefully.)

Kagura: Sadaharu! I see, you want to play tag don't you! Let's go to the park!

Gin: Oi! Kagura! You're just trying to skip out on work, aren't you! And how does taking eating Shinpachi's head make him want to go to the park?!?!

Sadaharu, goes, and puts gin's head in his mouth along with Shinpachi's. They are both losing a lot of blood.

Kagura: So can I go to the park?!?!

Gin: Fffffn!

Kagura: What? I can't hear you!

Gin: FFFFne!

Kagura: What? Speak English!

Gin punches the wall, and writes with his nails "FINE."

Kagura: Oh. Sadaharu, you can release them now.

Sadaharu releases gin and Shinpachi.

Gin: Oi! How was I supposed to talk with that thing's mouth covering my head?!?!?!

Kagura: bye bye! (She ignores Gin) She goes out.

Shinpachi and Gin lost a lot of blood, but are otherwise fine.

Shinpachi goes outside, and waves the people outside in because they were just standing there doing nothing, and he thinks they couldn't find the house.

Everyone is now in the house, and are all standing around uncomfortably because the house is too small. There are about twenty or so people.

Gin: So…(Begins picking his nose again, there must be a lot of boogers in there.) Why are all of you here? Wait, before that, how much are you going to pay?

Shinpachi: Gin, don't be rude! Hehe…sorry about that. Would you like any tea?

Twenty or so people suddenly look up, as if they are just paying attention.

Everyone: Yes please!

Kagura: Oi! You! (She points at Shougo) What are you doing here?!?!

Sougo: I don't know. I saw this piece of paper, and I came.

Sougo hands over an invitation.

"Urgent! The world as you know it will cease to exist if you don't come to this meeting! If you do not come, and you end up buried on the side of the road dead, then do not blame us. We warned you."

Gin: WHAT?!?! SO YOU DIDN'T NEED OUR HELP AFTER ALL! Besides, even an idiot can tell that this note is a fake, I mean who the hell would fall for such a stupid prank?!?

Naruto: Um…actually, I got a slightly different note.

"Free ramen sale! Get free ramen. Urgent! By the way, this is NOT a scam. Don't be suspicious."

Shinpachi arrives with twenty cups of tea, and falls over after hearing Naruto. All of the tea falls over.

Shinpahi: What the hell?!?! How can you fall for that stupid note?!?! It's so suspicious!

Naruto: Huh?!? It is not suspicious at all!

Shinpachi: It is defiantly suspicious! And what are you wearing anyways?!? What's with the orange jump suit! I mean, I've been called "tasteless, unfashionable, and completely ignorant" but COME ON! Even I know that orange is unfashionable. (Shinpachi is now pointing at Naruto, and sweating like crazy after his crazy outburst.) (Ever since Shinpachi heard of "Naruto," he has wanted to tell Naruto this.)

Agito: Fuck you all. I'm going home.

Shougo: Wait. I mean no matter what, getting this many people in this house is a pretty good scam. At least we should play along with it for now. I think we should all introduce ourselves, I mean am I the only one who thinks this might be kind of interesting?

Hijikata: (He starts smoking.) Who the hell made you the boss?

Sasuke: Ok, I'm leaving. I have to get back to my training.

Naruto: Yeah! Me too! Sasuke will never out train me!

Gin: (He bursts out laughing.) Wow! The youth these days! I remember when I was your age. I used to pick on over- enthusiasts like you two. We'd give you wedgies, and everything. (Gin is only saying that. In reality, he was the one who get picked on, but not because he was over-enthusiastic.)

Naruto and Sasuke: Why you…

Yamamoto: Well, it seems like you two know each other, and I know Collonello, Byakuran, Hibrari, and Belphegor, so I think we are all here in groups. I think we should group together and introduce ourselves, just like what that guy said.

Agito: Fuck. What a waste of time. I bet in a little while, you're going to make us wear nametags too!

Yamamoto: Good thinking little dude!

Agito: (He flicks Yamamoto off.) Don't EVER call me that ever again, or you'll be sorry. Fuck.

Sougo: Whatever, just do he said. Shinpachi, go get nametags!

Shinpachi: Hey! Why am I always getting things! Why am I always your servant! (He goes to get nametags anyways.)

Everyone in the room begins to organize themselves.

Sougo: Ok, now, you guys tell the group what manga you are from, what the manga is about, and introduce your characters. Now, I know some of you may be arch enemies, but please refrain from killing each other until the day is over. Ok, you two who were fighting over there, you go first. (He is looking at Gray and Natsu.)

Gray: Ok, this idiot and I are from this manga called Fairy Tail. Fairy Tail is about wizards who fight in various jobs for their guild. I am an ice wizard, and he is a fire wizard.

Natsu: Hey! I'm not the idiot here! You're an exhibitionist! Look! He's even undressing himself right this moment! By the way, I'm Natsu and he's Gray and we're from the guild Fairy Tail. (Hence the manga's name.)

Ikuto: …and I thought the guy with the black hair was cool for a second…

Sougo: Next…

Tyki: Jasdebi and I are the supposedly "evil" people of the manga D-Gray Man.

Gin: Oh! It's you guys! Gintama made fun of your manga before!

Jasdevi: (They hold up a gun.) May I shoot this guy now?

Tyki: Not yet, after all, we are the guests. We shouldn't cause havoc, now should we? (He grins sinisterly.) We want to destroy the world, and are Noahs. I'm the Noah of pleasure, and can pass through things.

Jasdevi: And we are the Noah of bonds. We shoot magic bullets out of this gun. Right now we are in our combined form, but we are actually two different people. Our manga is about the Earl and the Noahs who want to destroy the world. We are helped by the Akuma. The Dark Order as a group of Innocent holders who are trying to stop us.

Sougo: ….Next….

Lavi: Wait! I'm with them too despite my "normal" appearance! (He's glaring at Tyki and Jasdevi because they forgot him.) I'm a "bookworm" and am supposed to just be there to collect data, but I actually just fight with the Dark Order right now. I fight with a big hammer and emjoy smashing things.

Sougo: next.

Kazu: …Um…Agito, Akito, and I are from Air Gear. We battle other teams using air trecks, and we are trying to get the sky regalia. I'm the sidekick, and am the current flame king, and Agito's the Blood King. Akito and Agito share a body, and they switch their personalities by moving the eye patch.

Akito: (Smiles sweetly) Hi guys! XD Oh….Ikki's not here…I wish Ikki was here. ToT

Note: In here, Agito and Akito somehow happen to have separate bodies even though they still have the eye patches.

Agito: …fuck…I'm just Akito's bodyguard for now…fuck.

Sougo: …next… (That's all he can think of to say. He's in a state of shock, like everyone else in the room.)

Light: …

L: …I guess I will be the one to speak then. I am a detective trying to catch Kira (This comes from the word "killer.") who is killing criminals across the world through heart attacks, though I had deducted that it is not the only means of killing people. I like sweets.

Light: I am aiding L in catching this Kira person, though anyone reading this manga knows I'm really kira. Oh…I'm also trying to kill L…

L: WHAT?!?

Light: What, that guy said we can't kill each other.

L: I suppose so. But even so, physically, there is nothing no barrier in this room that is stopping me from killing you, so I see no point in you revealing this in the first place.

Light: Yeah…but you see, I've already won. Look at my invitation card.

"Dear Light Yagami and L Lawliette, you are coordinately invited to the international club of geniuses. Here, you can play chess with people like you from across the dimensions, and will be able to see Albert Einstein's brain."

Note: Light/Kira only needs a name or a face to kill, so since he found out L's name, he has the ability to kill L using his "Death note."

Light: I decided that since this card gave me your name and secured me the position of God of the new world, I might as well attend as a token.

L: Yes…hmmm…then it is a wonder I'm not dead yet.

Light: Yes. Unfortunately, it seems that even though I write your name in my death note here, it doesn't work. But when we return to our original manga, well….hehehehe (Light's evil laughter….)…the world will be mine! And, I've read the manga, and I already know you die on volume 5 or 6….or something like that….

L: Oh yes, I read that too. That was quite an intricate plan you set up there. (To kill me.) I must say, I am very impressed. But don't worry; you're going to die as well. (Snide grin.)

Light: So you DID know I was kira? (Light is confused.)

Gin: God, will you guys just SHUT UP ALREADY?!?! I don't care if one of you is going to die! I don't even want you in my house! (Unless you are going to pay me!) You guys should just get out. And hey you! Don't read my Jump!

Yamamoto: …sorry…. (I don't think Yamamoto reads Jump, but compared to Light reading Jump or something like that, he's the best choice.)

Shinpachi: (He pushes up his glasses.) I think I will have to agree with Gin…will all of you please leave unless you are actual customers? (Also, we are running low of tea.)

Hitsugaya: That's it. I'm leaving.

Sougo: Wait, At least tell us who you are, and your manga and stuff.

Hijikata: Boy, you sure are persistent. (He is referring to Sougo.)

Hitsugaya: I am captain Hitsugaya of the 13 quart guard squads. I am with Ulquiorra, and we are SUPPOSED to be killing each other right now. Unfortunately, it seems that there is not room for us to engage in combat at this very moment, and for some reason, I am not able to draw out my zanpakutō.

Ulquiorra: Yeah, what he said. We are from the manga Bleach, and it's about the Soul Society, and Hitsuguya and other soul Reapers who are trying to protect the human world and the soul world. The arrancars and Captain Issan are currently fighting the Soul Reapers in the anime on Cartoon Network every Saturday night. I am arrancar number 4.

Sougo: next. (He finally recovered from the shock off everyone in the room being so "different.")

Miwa: I am Miwa from ½ Prince. It is basically a video game in which the main character who is a girl who becomes the first and only transvestite in the game. She, now a he banded together with other characters to form the "Odd Squad." They fight with monsters and other players. As for my character in the story, well, actually, I only had a few panels, and I was a relatively minor character.

Sougo: Next

Lelouch: I am the terrorist who destroys the Holy Britanian Empire, and conquers the entire world all for justice. Then, everyone hater me, so I asked one of my friends to kill me so that they will put all the hate on me. I kind of regret this plan now, because a lot of my old friends seem to be talking to me even though I'm already dead. A lot of people around them are beginning to wonder if they're ok….oh yeah, and my name is Lelouch, I have an eye that has the power of absolute submission, and my anime is called Code Geass.

Ikuto: (Note, Sougo does not have to keep saying next anymore.) My name is Ikuto, and my manga is called Shugo Chara. In it, we have guardian charas who give us magical powers. If you are strong enough, you are able to transform by using your guardian chara. In my transformation, my character wears a shirt that looks more like a sports bra than a shirt, making many people think I'm gay. In fact, my character is not gay, but actually has a slight crush on an elementary schooler. By the way, my character is in HIGH SCHOOL. In the manga, almost every male character likes the same girl. She is the elementary schooler I am crushing on, and is also the main character…God, I feel so lame, saying it like this. I never knew, but could I be…a…pedophile?!?!? (Ikuto is going through a mental breakthrough; please give him your patience.)

Keima: I am Keima from the World Only God knows. (Keima is playing a girl-catching video game at the same time.) I met a "devil" from the underworld, and have to help her catch spirits by making 3-d girls fall in love with me. I am "God" of making 2-d video game girls in falling in love with me, so I use the strategies in the games to help me in real life. Mainly, however, I just enjoy playing video games, and have conquered every game I have played so far in record time.

Naruto: And we are from Naruto! XD We are ninja of the hidden leaf village, and I'm going to be Hokage someday! BELIEVE IT!

Sasuke: I'm Sasuke of the hidden leaf village as well…

Sougo: Now it's our turn. I'm Sougo from the anime Gintama, and I part of the Shensingumi with Hijikata. We fight to provide world peace.

Hijikata: I'm Hijikata.

Gin: Like HELL you guys provide world peace! You! (He points at Sougo) You CHAINED Hijikata and me together! You freaking sadist! Since you chained both our arms together, do you know how hard it is to go number two in Japanese styled toilet?!?! And you! (He points at Hijikata) You are the "demonic vice president" but you also have a split personality of an otaku because of your cursed sword.

Hijikata: eh…What are you talking about? I already got rid of that personality before. Weren't you watching that episode?!?!

Gin: Whatever mayo-freak. Hey, look, Shinpachi's back with all the nametags. Shinpachi is the "normal Joe" of Gintama, and he works for me…I think that is all there is to say about him…

Shinpachi: Why do I only get two lines to describe myself?!?! Let me continue, I enjoy Otose-sans's singing, and am going to marr-

Sougo: oh, look, the reader's bored from looking at this entire monologue. I think this conclu-

Belphegor throws a knife that lands right besides Sougo's head.

Belphegor: (He smiles a creepy smile.) Nobody forgets Prince. (Sougo forgot to have the Kateiyoshi Hitman Reborn gang explain their anime and stuff.)

Sougo: Oops. All well. We'll start from here tomorrow, now let's get to bed and go to slee-

Collonello (Adult): Oi, what! But we're the only manga left!

Byakuran: Besides, I doubt we can leave; I've already tried…many times…

Sougo tries to open the door, but it doesn't open. He turns around, and Prince is smiling wickedly while glaring down at Sougo. Sougo returns the smile. (Prince is a genius who enjoys killing, and Sougo is a sadist who enjoys to torture people…oh crap.)

Sougo: Oh, since that's the situation, then why don't you begin?

Prince: Gladly. My, Yamamoto, and Collonello are from the Vongola family, and we are fighting against Byakuron using rings and box weapons. I use knives…

Yamamoto: I use a sword…

Collonello: I use guns…

Byakuron: and nobody knows what I use except that I like food. X) (He eats a marshmallow.)…oh, but a recent chapter says I can travel through dimensions…

Suddenly, a piece of paper comes through the door crack.

"Dear readers,

You are invited to play 30 minutes in heaven, and since you are stupid enough to actually go to a stranger's house, (Gin's house.) you are obliged to play. If you don't you will never be able to leave, unless…" (There was an ink spill there.) (Then it continues) "Here is a list of your partners for this game, but you can choose amongst yourselves to which pair goes first."

List:

Miwa, Hijikata

Agito, Ikuto

Gintoki, Naruto

Shinpachi, Keima

Sougo, Lavi

Tyki, Natsu

Lelouch, Light

Ulquiorra, Yamamoto

Kazu, L

Belphegor, Sasuke

Akito, Hitsuguya

"The game thirty minutes in heaven will take place in Gin's bedroom. The pair will enter the room, and close the door. When the pair has entered the room, there has to be no lights on. After that, the pair can do whatever they want with each other until the thirty minutes is up. When the pair is inside the room, the rest of you can do whatever you may wish, as long as you are in the house at all times. Continue this until every pair is finished."

Everyone except Agito: Oh crap.

Agito: Fuck.


End file.
